Swens N’ Dobs // Mission Impossible

This week, we journeyed to Rosedale Mall to see Kingsman: The Secret Service, a spy movie starring Colin Firth (The King’s Speech), Samuel L. Jackson (Star Wars), Michael Caine (The Prestige), and Mark Strong (Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy). The film introduces Taron Egerton as Egsy, a troubled teenager given a chance at a position with the Kingsmen, an underground ring of British spies that wear bespoke suits and spectacles. Egsy attempts to pass a number of elaborate tests in order to become a Kingsman, while his mentor (Colin Firth) tries to foil a billionaire’s evil plot to destroy the world with sim cards. Kingsman is currently in theaters.


Did the makers of Kingsman select their actors from a list of the most typecast people in Hollywood? Prim British badass: Colin Firth. Older, slightly sketchier British badass: Michel Caine. Loud quirky villain: Samuel L. Jackson. You could predict the plot of the movie from the credits alone. Whatever you’re imagining is probably pretty accurate. There’s a fair amount of shooting people with spy umbrellas, poison ballpoint pens, lectures about being a “gentleman” and posh school boys that antagonize our lower class protagonist. You get the picture. Kingsman is a self-indulgent comic book on screen, complete with blood and guts, the exploding heads of famous people, nauseating cinematography and punchy dialogue that mixes the genre’s clichés with a shakerful of vulgarity. Colin Firth looks like he doesn’t want to be there, and Samuel L. Jackson (with a lisp) should be getting bored of himself if he isn’t already. Kingsman is entertaining, but don’t bother seeing it in theaters unless you’re babysitting a 13-year-old boy in need of distraction and some dangerous inspiration.


To start off, I was the one who wanted to see this movie. For some reason, I really enjoyed the trailers and it took me back to elementary/middle school when I was reading the Alex Rider series. Unlike Allison, I actually really enjoyed the movie (I guess I am a 13-year-old boy in need of distraction and some dangerous inspiration). It combines some unique action with very comic-book style effects. At one point, numerous peoples’ heads explode — but instead of being graphic, the heads explode with a cloud of color. It is choices like these that separate it from the usual spy flick. There are also numerous scenes in which Egsy has to take care of a pug puppy and it was the most adorable thing ever. Overall, while I do not think it is a necessity to go see this movie in theaters, I think that it provides an entertaining and action-packed experience that you should seek out eventually.

Movies like Kingsman: Alex Rider: Operation Stormbreaker, Kick-Ass, Agent Cody Banks