What I Learned in Bed with Hannah Wydeven

By Hannah Wydeven

Dear Hannah,
My penis is slightly curved when I have an erection. Is that a problem? Will it be painful or difficult for someone to have sex with me?
Questionably Curved Penises come in all shapes, sizes, curves and colors, QC, and whatever your penis looks like, it’s fine the way it is. Not every erection is perfectly straight, stiff and parallel to the floor. Everyone’s penis looks different when erect and there is no problem in that. As long as you can reach orgasm, you don’t have painful erections, and the bend in your penis is not severe enough that you have problems putting on a condom, having a curve in your penis is nothing to worry about.

In terms of having sex, a curved penis shouldn’t present a problem in bed either. A slight curve will not change the way it feels for you, and it shouldn’t affect your partner. I have even heard women say they prefer the feeling of a slightly curved penis during sex because it is more interesting. Who knows, the curve in your penis might be the exact angle needed to hit your next lover’s g-spot.

If you find that the curve in your penis is causing you problems like pain, or if your curve is more like a 90 degree angle, then speak with a urologist and see what they think of your bent manhood. Don’t believe the bogus e-mails you get about fixing your curved penis, that phony medicine won’t do anything. Besides, it is bull to believe that you would need to fix it anyway. Be proud of your sexy curved penis.

Dear Hannah,
I recently lost my virginity to my boyfriend and it hurt a lot for me the first time. The problem is that it still hurts every time I do it! I have never had an orgasm from sex. Is there something wrong with me?! Will I ever enjoy sex?!
Desperate for Pleasure

You most definitely can and will enjoy sex, you will not die alone or hate sex for the rest of your life, you are normal. Relax. If you’re experiencing pain while you’re having sex, there are several reasons it could be happening. The first time you had sex, you could have had some pain from your hymen, either breaking it or stretching it, something that may not have ever happened to you before. This is that “popping the cherry” thing that causes women to have pain and sometimes a little bleeding the first time. Once that’s over, your hymen shouldn’t present a problem for you.

That doesn’t mean, however, all of a sudden after you lose your virginity that your vagina is a magical machine that can expand to the shape of any penis in the world, and accept all sorts of rigorous sexual activity. You have to ease into sex to make it comfortable for you. Tell your boyfriend to take it a little slower and slow down the insertion process, he can’t just come running at you with his boner-that hurts. Also, once you start having sex, it can be painful to continue for a long time if you are new to the game. If you’re well into it and you start to feel sore or tired, call a time-out and take a break. Don’t start abusing your vagina just because you’re letting it out to play, that’s not nice, and you’ll pay for it the next day.

You might not be lubricated enough when you start off your sexual exploits. Either because you and your boyfriend are skipping the essential foreplay portion of the evening, you’re too nervous to even think about being wet, or like many women, you don’t get wet enough to have sex every single time. So lube it up baby, and don’t be scared. People have a weird aversion to lube that I don’t understand. Get over it and slap on some water-based lubes next time you’re in the sack (remember, water-based only with condoms!).

The most mysterious and illusive answer of all? Communicate with your partner. Tell him that it hurts you to have sex because you need it slower, wetter, and shorter for a while until you get used to how things work. Tell him what positions feel good and which ones don’t, and work together to figure out the best way to make you orgasm (hint, the clitoris is outside the vagina). There is nothing wrong with you, DFP, and once you figure out the basics for getting pleasure from your sexy times, you will see that.