Schwager Sigma Schwager

By Liz Scholz

Schwager House Members since June 2008 (from Left to Right, pictured below): Mike Kennedy (Economics, Political Science; Chicago, Ill.), Nisha Singh (Political Science, Math; Houston, Tex.), Mitch Stepleton (Economics; Boulder, Co.), Dan Esrig (Economics, Geography; Evanston, Ill.), Zach Schwager (Biology; Providence, R.I.), Matt Thrasher (English, Russian, International Studies; St. Louis Park, Minn.), Will Butler (Neuroscience; Red Wing, Minn.), Adam Oien (Computer Science; Conrad, Mont.)

TMW: Why do you call it Schwager House?

Nisha Singh: Well based on what I heard, I was confused at first because he wasn’t even living here the first semester, but basically he always wanted to live in a fraternity, I guess, so. he thought it would be cool to live in a fraternity so we actually have a logo, don’t we? It’s like Schwager Sigma Schwager or something.
Adam Oien: It was supposed to go on the house.

Matt Thrasher: It started off as a joke. Then it became too real.

Dan Esrig: We were going to put a picture of him up there but we never actually got it up.

TMW: How do you feel about sports?

MT: Sports are good. That’s our official stance.

AO: Three of us are on the baseball team.

Mike Kennedy: And three of the guys play hockey.

AO: Matt played intramural basketball.

MT: Yeah I did. Shut up, we were good. We were bad, we were really bad. I’m a pretty unsuccessful intramural athlete.

MK: They call him Windex because he cleans the glass.

TMW: How do you [Singh] feel about being the only female in this house?

NS: It’s all right. Initially my logic was that, I lived with Adam for freshman year summer and I was like, “Well, once you’ve crossed the line and lived with one, what’s seven more? Or six more?”

AO: I baited her into it.

MT: What’s this, a sausage factory? We don’t have personalities? Once you’ve got one, why not go six more?!

TMW: How do the rest of you feel about Nisha being the only female?

DE: It’s fine, it’s good.
Mitch Stepleton: Because if it was all guys it would just be so messy all the time. Because Nisha’s the primary mover and shaker in keeping things clean.

AO: Dan’s second though.

TMW: Do you do anything as a house?

AO: We did once.

DE: We grizzle.

MT: It was fun.

NS: Not all of us grizzle. We barbeque, that’s something everyone can partake in. And we have a hot tub.

MT: We grizzle.

NS: Not all of us can grizzle!
MK: We bicker.

DE: We used to play super Smash Brothers together all the time, but then we broke it.

MT: That’s true.

Will Butler: We played it too much.

NS: Some of us played, some of us napped while they played.

DE: We always celebrate all of our birthdays together, which is fun.

TMW: What’s grizzling?

DE: Grizzling is where we go to a place like an Applebee’s or a Chili’s that has goofy shit on the wall and. it’s actually a Zach Schwager invention I believe, or from Rhode Island I guess. But I don’t know, sophomore year, we talked about trying to make our house into a Grizzlebees-type atmosphere with goofy shit on the walls.

MK: Which it kind of is.

NS: Completely successful.

DE: We have our Domino’s pizza sign, an old Seurat painting.
MK: We wanted to get snow shoes and skates and stuff but never really got that.

NS: I think the “poker players and loose women” sign pretty much covers any other goofy shit that we don’t have.
WB: Then there’s the Nisha wall.

DE: We have our picture wall, which has stopped growing but.

NS: It’s in process.

AO: It’s a down year.

TMW: What’s the picture wall?

NS: Well, one day I was at work over the summer and there was a color printer nearby so we printed out this one picture.

MT: One thing lead to the other.

DE: Which picture did it start with?
NS: It started with the one of Matt and Adam and their angel costumes and Dan in the middle as a farmer shooting something. Shooting the camera.

DE: There are some good pictures on that wall.

NS: The only rule is that it has to be of all of us basically. Because once you make exceptions, it just gets out of hand.

MT: That’s right we shouldn’t.

AO: What shouldn’t we do, Matt?
DE: Will censors everything Matt says.

WB: Matt doesn’t have a voice of his own.

DE: We have mice. You probably shouldn’t include that.

NS: No that’s fine, they’re part of the house too.

MT: We should put them on the wall. After we kill them.

NS: Skin them and put them up there.

WB: I tried to put them in the basement, but then I decided I didn’t want a rotting mouse in the basement.

DE: We’re getting a privacy fence outside, so we’ll have some privacy.

WB: It’ll be nice for winter hot-tubbing.

NS: Apparently our hot tub is an eye sore to the condo complex next door.

DE: I think the eyesore is us.

NS: We’re the eyesore?
MK: Our flabby physiques.

DE: I like that we all lived together, freshman year and sophomore year. I think that’s funny.

NS: Well, not all of us lived together sophomore year.

DE: No but I mean there can’t be too many houses of eight people who lived together on the same floor. Maybe it says something for Macalester’s placement, freshman placement.

NS: Maybe it says something for our social skills.

AO: Or lack thereof.

MT: Mitch likes to play loud music.

MS: I enjoy it from time to time. Pretty much just ignoring everyone else.

MT: Mitch’s hobbies: playing loud music, reading Bronco blogs.

MS: Matt likes to be an asshole.

MT: That’s not true. Nope.

MK: The house is big on poker. Adam over here, I don’t know what the official title is, but he’s the winner of some sort of weekly championship.

AO: Master of the universe.

MT: Adam’s a poker master. Will taught him everything he knows.

AO: Will has a home brew business.

WB: Business is a little strong.
DE: Dirk’s Panty dropper, the recent brew. To drop the name.

WB: Panty peeler, Dan.

TMW: How are you going to get rid of those mice?

AO: We caught three in three days.

DE: We caught four or five, it was almost like a genocide.

MT: Dan Esrig: Rat Genocide. Panty Peeler beer.

TMW: Is there anything else you guys want to say?

DE: We have house meetings that last for a long time.

MS: Oh, hours.

DE: We try to solve our problems and work through our issues.

WB: They usually end in genocide.

MK: That’s kind of funny, I’m kind of extremely uncomfortable right now.

AO: We get along pretty well for eight people who randomly met at Macalester.

NS: There’s a fair balance of abuse and-what’s the opposite of abuse? I don’t even remember anymore.

MT: I think that’s love, Nisha.

DE: We should talk about Schwager for a little bit. He’s a good guy, most of the time. We’ve lived together for four years.

MK: I don’t find him offensive.

WB: High praise for Mike Kennedy.

AO: It was a pretty sweet day when Schwager actually returned to Schwager House.

DE: He was happy.

AO: We were happy.

DE: He brings joy to the house.

NS: He has a little trouble with the chore list but we love him anyway.

* * * * * * *

Zach Schwager: Well my favorite part about living in the house is definitely the togetherness. You know I feel like we all just get together and hang out, and it’s great. You come home, and there’s always something going on, there’s always someone watching tv, just ready to hang out, and I think that’s great. I really enjoy having so many people around and really get a chance to make so many friendships that I know are really going to last. It’s just great.