Lucy & Taryn Beer Club: Beerds

“Lo those many moons ago,” we’re told, Jonas Yela’s father taught him to appreciate beer. “Do you taste that flowery bitterness? Do you taste that malty goodness? My son, go out into the world and love beer,” he instructed. Now, about a decade later, both Jonas and his childhood friend, Andrew Hansen, (sometimes) qualify for the “Beer and Beards” identity we pursued this week. Jonas didn’t actually have a beard at the time of reckoning, but Andrew’s more than made up for Jonas’s lack of facial hair. According to Andrew and Jonas, beards offer fluffy comfort, a spot to thoughtfully stroke, and a depository for stray pencils. We’ve always been curious; now we know.

Andrew and Jonas love beer as well as their beards. We made our way to the Blue Door this week, driven to seek comfort and routine on a day of bitter cold and malfunctioning cars. The Blue Door, for the six people on campus that haven’t heard of it, is a quality institution on Fairview and Selby. Often filled to the brim with jubilant Macalester students (even, we find, on Monday nights), the Blue Door offers great happy hours, a steamy chalkboard, cozy ambience and magnificent burgers.
Our orders? Taryn got the Alaskan Amber, an oldie-but-goodie that hasn’t received enough playtime in the game of beer recently. Andrew chose the Indeed Daytripper, a local favorite he chose because of the moniker it shares with a classic Beatles song. This song has now become the soundtrack to Taryn and Lucy’s Tuesday afternoon column writing sessions. (Andrew and Jonas also have in common their love of music—more on this later.) Andrew described the Daytripper as, “good. I like it.”

After this rousing and detailed review, Jonas described his Lagunitas Sucks as a double IPA, saying, “I (expletive) love it.” Jonas’s experience with beer, though initiated by the aforementioned fatherly education, relates both to his hometown—Milwaukee is the Brew City, after all—and to his subconscious. He fears that his choice of spirit beer indicates that, “my brain is trying to tell me something”: The Arrogant Bastard is a Stone IPA that is, “really hoppy, IPA to the (expletive) max. You drink it, and it’s punching you in the face, like YOU’RE DRINKING ME.”

Andrew’s journey with beer, if less idyllic, feels pretty relatable. Initially, “I hated [beer], it was terrible, but if you wanna play fun games, beer is pretty much A+.” However, when Andrew came to college he discovered Milwaukee’s Red Dog, without a doubt his spirit beer. He is currently collecting boxes (five since last semester so far) in order to compile a Red Dog suit of armor for next Halloween. If next October you see a figure covered in angry bulldogs and cardboard, chances are it’s Andrew.
Andrew and Jonas’s friendship is the stuff of Macalester lore. Friends in elementary school, meh in middle school (who wasn’t, really, though), friends again in high school, coincidentally off to Macalester together—now they cohost a radio show! 91.7 WMCN FM, Thursday nights, 10-11pm, the Lords of Thünder (umlaut silent) play a diverse selection of metal music for public enjoyment.

Parting messages? The PBR sign still lives in Milwaukee as a reminder of its brewing history there. Andrew and Jonas give a shoutout to our own PBR, President Brian Rosenberg. They promise to “purchase the sign for you, and donate it to you personally, and hang it on your house, with or without your consent.” If we can hold them off, PBR, how about guesting us with your presence at next week’s LTBC? Just kidding. But for real, though. You don’t even have to grow a beerd.