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Ciara – Ok, so Ciara’s new album isn’t even out yet. But she did release a music video for her song Body Party that accomplishes more than some people do in entire albums, so she belongs on this list anyways. Although it’ll be hard for C to top her video for Ride (I can’t even talk about that video because words don’t do it justice…just watch it), Body Party is pretty close. Imagine Beyonce’s Dance for You video (if the guy in it was actually Jay Z) or the Crazy in Love video (if Jay Z didn’t kill the vibe with a mediocre verse) but with Ciara and Future. I’m not saying that it’s better than a Jay and B video, but I’m not saying it’s not better than a Jay and B video. There are so many exciting people in the video that I had to watch it multiple times to identify them all. I might have missed some, but thus far I spy Trinidad Jame$, Ludacris and Jazzy Pha. A+ Fall Out Boy­—The chorus of the first track on FOB’s new album Save Rock and Roll goes “Hey young blood / Doesn’t it feel like our time is running out? / I’m gonna change you like a remix / Then I’ll raise you like a phoenix,” which is not-so-subtly what they’re going for in their music career. I bet they were waiting for some music journalist to point it out, so here ya go, guys. I can definitely picture this album being the warm up CD for a JV sports team. I imagine that if they play it live at an arena/festival show, there will be a bunch of really unnecessary pyrotechnics. It’s just poppy enough that you can kind of unconsciously bob your head to it but still has all of the angst you’d expect from Fall Out Boy. It sounds like they’re trying to reach out to today’s teens (even though their original fan base is probably mostly twenty-somethings at this point) with the Big Sean collaboration and use of the word “vintage.” Not gonna lie, I kind of jammed out to it anyways. I can picture them playing this in the Leonard Center and me being ambivalent, rather than outraged, that they play more Maroon 5 than any human being could possibly want to hear in that building. B+

Justin Timberlake — In case you didn’t read The Mac Weekly last week, I’ll repeat myself: I would be really, really happy if I never heard JT’s falsetto for the rest of my life. Unfortunately for me, this album is 1) everywhere and 2) full of said falsetto. I know that last week (seriously read TMW every week, it’s important cultural capital) I made fun of Major Lazer for having terrible lyrics (which they do), but at least with dancehall and reggae lyrics you have to listen to a song upwards of ten times to understand what they’re saying. The delivery can make it sound good, regardless of content. Justin Timberlake’s lyrics are both audible and terrible. Don’t believe me? “Everybody’s looking for the fliest thing to say (fliest thing to say) / But I just want to fly (fly away with you, you, you, you) / I don’t want to be the one to alienate, yeah (alienate) / You see, I’m trying to find an alien in you (you, you, if it’s cool, cool).” I could give you more examples but I already deleted this album because I would be traumatized and/or mortified if it ever came up on shuffle. F

Paramore — At first, I didn’t really notice when the Fall Out Boy album ended and this one came on. I guess that happens when you spend multiple hours listening to albums that you would never, ever pay for. Hayley Williams seems like she’s trying to channel Karen O, and it’s working out alright. Like Fall Out Boy, this sounds a lot like their 2006 stuff but with boosted bass and more boring instrumentals, which is what 2013 sounds like, I guess. I don’t really have that much to say about this one. It isn’t as grating as I thought it would be, but it doesn’t really command my attention for more than 45 seconds either. C+